rewrite this title Wall Street OGs are buying the crypto hype

GM. Welcome to your daily squeeze of crypto goodness – freshly pressed and brimming with the juiciest market updates.

🏦 Goldman Sachs is turning its digital asset platform into a new company.

⛓ Bitfinex hackers face the consequences of their actions.

🍊 News drops: Binance’s upcoming launch is giving Terra flashbacks, Coinbase CEO is meeting Donald Trump + more

🍍 Market flavor today

Fear and Greed Index check: we’re in full nothing can stop me mode – sitting all the way up at 90 in Extreme Greed. Bitcoin is still doing its thing, swinging between $90K and $92K.

Meanwhile, MicroStrategy just said, hold my wallet. They bought $4.6B worth of Bitcoin yesterday, pushing their stash to 331K BTC. And guess what? They’re planning to raise $1.75B at 0% interest to grab even more. If they throw the whole bag at Bitcoin, that’s another 19K BTC coming their way.

Bitcoin ETFs are also back in the game. After a shaky end to last week with $770.7M in outflows, they’re kicking off the week strong with $254.8M flowing back in yesterday.

But the real tea? ☕️ CryptoQuant’s contributor Burakkesmeci spotted a golden cross in Bitcoin’s Puell Multiple. That’s the ratio of the daily value of newly minted Bitcoins to its 365-day moving average – an indicator of mining revenues versus market movements. Historically, when this golden cross shows up, Bitcoin tends to go sicko:

Add that to the current macro environment, and people are whispering about a potential price jump of up to 90%.

TL;DR: Big money’s moving, charts are glowing, and Bitcoin is feeling itself 💅 With these pieces falling into place – what’s next could be game-changing!

💼 From suits to Sats

You know when you show your mom a meme, and instead of laughing, she starts asking these random questions like “Who’s that?” while looking like this:

Yeah, older people going digital can be cringe sometimes. The crypto version of that, tho’? Still a little weird, but it makes your wallet super happy.

Goldman Sachs, the Wall Street OG, the second-largest investment bank in the world, is diving deeper into crypto waters. They’re planning to turn their digital assets platform into a new company, so large financial companies can use blockchain to create, trade, and settle financial instruments.

The plan is still in its early stages, set to roll out in the next 12 to 18 months, assuming regulators don’t throw a tantrum.

So, what’s the big takeaway here? More institutional investors are coming to the crypto party. And they’re bringing 10 cans of bullish each for the rest of us to devour 🚀

🥰 Dating tips

It’s November, y’all – cuffing season is about to be in full swing, so let’s talk date ideas to keep things more interesting:

… perfect if you’re an amateur – you want something grandiose! Something your partner 100% hasn’t experienced before and will never forget! How about hacking a crypto exchange, stealing a bunch of Bitcoin, and laundering it? Aww, right? 💖

Credits for the idea go to Ilya Lichtenstein and Heather Morgan (aka Razzlekhan – yes, she raps… sort of).

Back in 2016, these two stole 119,754 Bitcoins from Bitfinex, worth $10.9B today. FYI: this was the biggest crypto seizure in US DOJ history.

So, what does this date get you? 

… yeah, ok, maybe it’s not really that good of an idea.

The mastermind behind the hack, Lichtenstein, got hit with a 5-year prison sentence earlier this month.

And yesterday, it was Morgan’s turn to face the music (pun intended). Her punishment? 18 months for laundering some of the BTC her hubby stole.

Tbh, if I were the judge, I’d have added at least an extra year just for her rap songs. I won’t link it here ’cause I respect you, but if you do wanna look ’em up, keep in mind that this is what the people think:

Anyways, moral of the story: let’s just stick to the basics in dating. ‘Cause nothing about a prison cafeteria dinner says romantic.

📰 News drops

⚖️ A federal judge in California ruled that DAOs could be treated like general partnerships under state law – basically, they’re seen as business entities. Translation? If you’re an active member, you could be held liable for what the organization does.

🤫 Rumors spread that Binance is gonna drop a stablecoin called BFUSD with a 19.55% APY. The crypto exchange later clarified that BFUSD won’t be a stablecoin but a margin trading asset. Still, that sky-high APY was a PTSD trigger for many, giving flashbacks to the TerraClassicUSD meltdown.

🤝 Coinbase CEO Brian Armstrong is reportedly about to hold a meeting with Donald Trump. While the agenda’s still unclear, it so happens to come at a time when Trump’s handpicking his inner circle – draw your own conclusions *wink wink*.

🙄 Speaking of, two insiders spilled the tea: Elon Musk’s nonstop appearances at Mar-a-Lago are starting to annoy Trump’s longtime inner circle. One source said, “He’s behaving as if he’s a co-president and making sure everyone knows it.”

🇰🇷 Paju city officials in South Korea are cracking down on unpaid taxes through crypto. They’ve given a warning: if you owe taxes and don’t pay up by the end of November, your crypto on exchanges will be confiscated and sold to cover the debt.

⛏ Bitcoin mining company BIT Mining admitted to bribing Japanese officials in an attempt to get a resort and casino license. The US SEC revealed that the company funneled roughly $2.5M in illegal payments through lavish gifts, vacations, and cold hard cash for Japanese politicians.

🍌 Juicy memes